Bachelor In Paradise S3:E9 Recap

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Last time on Bachelor In Paradise, we saw Ashley laughing at Caila's frustration with the whole process and so she just decided to leave. Will Jared stop her, or will Ashley get her wish?

Caila tells Jared that she's leaving because it's just too hard being there. He asks her why and she says, well, Ashley. He tells her to wait a few, he'll talk to Ashley first and she tells him she's leaving right now. Cause, dude. You're really responding to the news that your lady is leaving by going to talk to Ashley? I don't blame Caila one bit.

Jared goes to Ashley and she says, Say what? She left? Errrrr, she told me she doesn't like you? Ummm. And then the tears start to flow. Sigh. Lots of snorts, eye squeezes and whines. She just wanted to protect him, he's loyal, he protects her. "EVERYONE NEEDS A JARED IN THEIR LIFE!" He hugs her and then he leaves.

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Ashley waxes poetic on and on about Jared, while said human being runs after Caila in her SUV of Paradise exit. He catches up, natch, and they kissey-face. She tells him she's never had a man come after her like that before and well, who has? It's Paradise!

Everyone starts spreading the news about Jared and Caila leaving and once again their poor nerves are just shot. What is Ashley going to do now? Ashley says they ended up in a fight, cries and snorts for a minute, but she'll just focus on her now. It's all about her. She can't be a "lunatic" and she wants to impress Wells and move on. She fixes her makeup and, well that was anticlimactic. Huh. This lady is cray.

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Wells and Jami come back after a really really long time and proceed to tell them about their AMAZING time. Dune buggies, white shirt, brown shirt, waterfall. AMAZING. Plus, they were holding hands, so they went TO THAT BASE, just like him and Ashley!

Nick tells the couple about Jared and Caila leaving and Wells feels bad about not telling her about his date, so he takes her aside. He didn't want to "bum" her out, but the hand holding did super bummed her out. He explains how he was the only one around when she showed up and then stumbles when she asks if they'll hang out the whole week.

Jami, meanwhile, tells everyone that she's got Wells all wrapped up. Wells doesn't want to hurt Ashley, but he also wants to "explore" Jamie, so he tells Ashley that he's, "unsure". Ashley has totally matured, so she tells him it's all good. Uh huh. As she tells us, "Like, why would I want to deviate from that if it's working?"

Izzy and Brett are doing very well, at least in the physical sense. She tells us that she's never felt more physically connected to anyone before him. Wells thought he'd be ecstatic that two hot ladies would want him, but now he's just terrified. Yeah, well, it's Ashley, so...

More ladies! Lauren, from Ben's season shows up and the guys think she's hot, hot, hot. The ladies fill her in and Wells does not want to be asked out by her because he's got two too many gals as it is. Then, Shushauna comes in and she also has her eyes on Wells, just to complicate matters some more! According to some of the girls; she's Euro trash.

Shushauna and Lauren get a double date card and Shu takes Wells aside. Shu asks Wells if he'll go on the date and then Lauren asks Brett. Izzy, Ashley and Jami are all #SadPanda Especially Izzy, who's about to throw up from panic.

The double date is a surf lesson, so of course they get to ogle each other and according to Brett, "I've brought my beetches to the beaches." Not the best there, buddy. They have fun in the surf, drinking beer and playing around; they even have to bring out our friend The Black Bar, for Shu's butt! That's the sign of a great date!

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Grant and Lace are making out on the sand while Izzy complains some more about Brett being on a date. She knows he means a lot to her now. Meanwhile, Lauren tells Brett she's VERY attracted to him and she wants to know him better. They make out and he says they've made a good connection. He's confused, you guys.

Nick, the sage adviser, tells Ashley that Wells *may* think she's a stage 5 clinger and he wouldn't want her to not get the rose if he does like her, so maybe she should think about that. She agrees. Ah, thank you, voice of reason.

Wells makes out with Shu and says she may be an enchantress, she's sexy, she may put a spell on him, she's scary, ya'll. But in a good way. He doesn't know what to do about THREE women after him. Wells is the new Jared!

Evan and Carly make out on the beach while the lizards lurk. Well, they more than make out, because The Black Box covers his front. Thanks, producers. MY EYES.

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Evan recaps the JOSH SMASH event from the night before with Nick, Amanda and the Twins. He wonders if things will go cray again sometime soon. Josh, meanwhile, talks about people that are just bad news and you just can't let it affect you. Amanda is still wondering why everybody messes with them! Humph!

Amanda gets a date card and she's excited to go, but then she wonders if there's something she's missing. Hmmmm, should she have listened to everyone after all? Girl, don't even give us that fake-ass lip service. Your mind was made up the first time he stuck his greasy World Famous Mexican Pizza tongue down your throat.

So, they have PIZZA on their dinner date. They talk and Nick says even though their was a saboteur to their relationship, they are all good. She tells them she's a super great judge of character (HAHAHAHAHA) and that she trusts him. She once again, talks about how sadz it is that no one is happy for them, as they are so excited for each other.

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Josh wants to be with his best friend and he wants to marry his best friend. Amanda is his best friend. So, basically, HINT HINT, Amanda. He tells her he's falling in love with her. They kiss and then there's fireworks. No, really. The producers give them real fireworks.

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The double dater's come back and Ashley wonders if Wells will pick her; "A random girl from Canada," or "A Russian Hooker." Which is kinda great. Wells gets more kisses from Jami, because she's going for it. The Russian Hooker tells Ashley to go kiss him because he's a good kisser. HAHAHA. Love this woman.

Ashley then goes to Wells and kisses him, because she's going for it. That's it for this week! Tune in next week for TTM and her Season Finale recaps! It's been real, you guys!