Welcome back to Orphan Black, kicking it back to 2013 with what I'll call a BackWatch. Given the date, you probably know what else that refers to because sometimes I lack subtlety. Rolling E2 Instinct after the break.
Sarah (Tatiana Maslany) as Beth (also Tatiana Maslany) was on the run at the end of last episode; Katja (THEY'RE ALL TATIANA MASLANY) just being shot in her car after realising Sarah wasn't Beth. She had just picked up her ringing cell phone and...a woman is on the other end wanting to know what's going on?? I didn't get everything, except for the "they're killing us" part, so whoever is on the phone must be another person who looks exactly like Sarah, Beth and Katja.
The other woman asks Beth about samples: did she gets Katja's hair and blood samples? Er. Beth looks at slain, bloody Katja: well. She exhorts Beth to get rid of the body; "you're the cop, like, buy a shovel!"
So Sarah buys a shovel and buries Katja, while her friends hold her wake at Felix's apartment. Vic (Michael Mando) can't understand why Sarah killed herself: she had love. Felix (Jordan Gavaris) disagrees, what with all the beatings and such over the years and it gets ugly for a minute before Vic concedes.
Sarah's gone through the Katja's things, buried the body and cleaned the car. Now she just needs window and windshield replacements and I spent far too long wondering if she was going to smash it in so it looked less like bullet holes.
Vic is STILL attached to Felix: GO! Just GO! He has a plan, though, he wants to help take care of Kira, Sarah's daughter. He never met her because Sarah thought an abusive drug dealer wasn't Father of the Year material, but Vic wants to contribute financially. Felix FINALLY gets rid of Vic, just in time for Sarah to dodge him in the hallway.
Sarah and Felix are getting caught up until he notices the blood under her chin. What's going on?? Well. Sarah met the German and that's all she can say about it. She doesn't want to talk about that, she wants to talk about getting Kira (Skyler Wexler) back from Mrs. S. She didn't really think this thing through, did she?
She wants to run away with Kira and Felix with the $75,000 she took from Beth's bank account, there's just one problem. That money is gone and Art Bell (Kevin Hanchard)'s business card is in it's place as well as a bunch of files about Margaret Chen. She calls Art, he wants to meet her at Funt (Fun?) because even though she protests that he has it all wrong,
She gets home, damn, we forgot about her boyfriend Paul (Dylan Bruce). Where has she been all night? He's worried about her, standing there "dressing like a punk rock ho" which is kinda what I said but threw Barbie into the mix for no good reason. She blames it on the hearing, it's been reconvened and she needs to get on top of it. He thinks she's losing the plot again, they've been here before.
I'm sorry, I laughed out loud when he said he was leaving and going back to Cody's for awhile, she was so clearly relived and TOTALLY down for that. Okay! Go! She tries to fake a little dismay after, but the main part is: he leaves. She wonders
Felix told Sarah to do the hard stuff with Mrs. S, but here he is, doing her dirty work again. Siblings are the BEST. Mrs. S (Maria Doyle Kennedy) has a thick Irish accent and a metric tonne of dislike for Sarah, whom she apparently raised. She's Sarah and Felix's foster mother and that's why she has Kira.
Siobhan (that must be the S) went through it all with Sarah, she brought Felix and Sarah from London (by way of Ireland) for a fresh start and dealt with all the chaos a rebelling teenaged girl brings. She wouldn't change any of it, though, because of Kira. She is a gift.
Kira herself pops up then, where's Mommy? With some prompting, she answers her own question. When Mommy's ready, and when Mrs. S SAYS she's ready. That was creepy
Sarah's been reading Beth's statement to the police, we already know she's a quick study, so hopefully delivering a statement at the hearing will get her off the hook and gone.
She meets Art, who thinks the $75,000 was a payoff. She explains that it's hers and Paul's joint savings, she just hasn't told Paul just yet. He grabs her arm, hard. Is she wearing a wire?? What? Why would she be wearing a wire? Against him?
He makes her walk through it for him, there is only one story. This one. Well, there might be another, but it died with Beth Child's memory. Oh actually, there IS another story, but we get it from Art. She called it in after she saw there was just a phone in Margaret Chen's hand, not the gun she was expecting. Margaret Chen was also not who she was looking for. HOWEVER, what really happened is that Beth called Art first and HE put the phone in Margaret Chen's hand because Beth was high on medication.
Sarah is starting to get the shape of what happened and what she's up against.
He won't give her the money back until she's cleared, just to make sure he doesn't end up implicated in the death. Shite.
Felix welcomes her back with the news that she's not dead to her daughter, yay! Still no direct plan to see her yet, though, which confuses me. I couldn't see being able to go ten months without seeing my children, but men do it all the time, right? Can't be impossible.
Sarah gives Felix the skinny: she's on the hook until Beth is off the hook and then Beth's other phone ringing distracts them both. Sarah calls it the "least of her worries" and I don't know if I'd say that exactly: they WERE shooting at you just yesterday morning and it's all connected to that phone.
She puts in on speakerphone, the other woman who sounds just like her - Felix and I want to know if this is the Alison Hendrix from the photocopied birth certificates in the safety deposit box? We'll call her Alison to save time, and she wants Sarah as Beth to go get Katja's briefcase from her hotel room. Sarah found Katja's room key in her pocket last night, so she should be able to.
Sarah throws on a disguise and practices a German accent; she's onnit. She makes it through the lobby with two front desk staff hot on her heels and gains entry to the room, which is TRASHED.
What the hell?
The clerks are at the door and on the phone, nothing left but to try to push through. She's brought down to the lobby, where they ask why her room is TRASHED (same words!). She tries to explain
But they don't understand. They have a $6000 charge for her, AND her briefcase. It cost that much for a stupid sink???? Come ON! She gets the briefcase, though, rock and roll indeed.
Now Sarah just needs to be able to get INto the suitcase, which she does with some "encouraging." Inside are blood samples, one from a Danielle Fournier and then a bunch of paperwork from several other women who look exactly like her. Austria, Italy, France, and Scarborough, where Alison Hendrix lives.
Alison calls right on time but Sarah doesn't know what to do. Does she hand over the briefcase as Beth? She speaks to Alison in her English accent and Allison tries the "one of many, family whatsit" line, which means nothing to Sarah or me just yet. Alison hangs up.
Alison is in Scarborough, though, as Sarah said: that's practically local. She stakes out Alison's address and follows the red minivan that emerges. (That looks exactly like the red minivan I had!) Two adorable kiddos disembark and then Alison herself jumps out: she's the SoccerMom version of Sarah. Sarah is horrified
Sarah watches Alison take a call on her pink phone (that all the women use) and head into a private area in a suspicious manner. If she looks like Sarah, she must be good, right? SoccerMomSarah is scary AF
Alison isn't explaining who they are to each other, that is not her job, no, nope. And she's mean, too
Which is funny on a BUNCH of levels, but I'll just go with the obvious two: she's slagging her own mirror image and two: does EYES. Hahahaha!
I don't understand any of that. Alison must not have been who called Sarah as Beth, she's so antagonistic. I take back calling her that above.
Art's at her house, where is she? He doesn't believe she's in Scarborough, but she's at a Bed Bath and Beyond. Nobody wants to admit that. HAHAHAHA it's so true! He tells her: the shrink has declared her unfit for duty, which pushes back the hearing, which drags this on for longer.
She gets an emergency appointment with the psychiatrist, who very much does NOT think she's ready to go back to work. Sarah challenges her: what's with all the meds Beth is on? How about she explains to the board about how she made that mistake while high on all these overlapping scrips? Or is she making progress? Check and mate.
Hearing time! She does well, they'll let her know in two days. Art is still not letting her off the hook until she's fully reinstated.
Alison calls, oh dangit, I don't understand ANYTHING, she WAS the one on the phone and she'll see Sarah tonight at 9 pm at her house since she can't get a babysitter. She's clipping coupons while she yells at Sarah and that touch of ridiculous was awesome.
Sarah drags Felix out to the 'burbs with her as backup, she just needs someone to know where she is, even one with suburban stress pimples.
OHHHHH! There's ANOTHER twin there and THAT'S who was on the phone originally, so it wasn't AngryAlison after all! This is Cosima and she's kind of the funky homegirl version of Sarah, we're out to Sarah's freaked out "how many of us are there??"
Until next time you guys! Stay strong, you awesome peeps will get through.