New Girl S5:E11 The Apartment Recap

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In this episode of New Girl, we have three awesome guest stars:  Elizabeth Berkley of SBTB and that masterpiece known as Showgirls, Sam Richardson from Veep, and our regular guest star Nasim Pedrad. Let's dive on in!

There's a new principal at Jess's school and she's taking advantage of Jess. Her name is Becky "Don't call me Becky unless your'e riding me like a horse" Cavatappi, and she's given her a budget book the size of several "War and Peace" novels stacked together. It's a weeks worth of work and it should be her job to do it, not Jess's. She opens the package the guys have been speculating over and lets out some stress:



Cece is officially moving in with Schmidt into the apartment, so she's supposed to be packing up her stuff to move. Jess goes over and is dismayed to see she hasn't packed at all.

Meanwhile, Winston tells the guys he's asked for a new partner because he can't take hearing about Aly's boyfriend's fine ass anymore. In a flashback, she angrily hands him his drawer things in a box while naming them off, "Lucky crystal, key-chain fart maker, over 100 yogurt tops, your flattened penny collection, a signed copy of a Paul Reiser biography, baby carrot thumb drive, a picture of you and Dave Coulier, loose Pez, my mom's cell number, a ticket stub from "Urinetown". When did you even see that?" She pulls out some sort of gag eye glasses with peace bobbles on them "WHY, WHY?" "Oh, and your Pure Moods CD. This thing makes me want to swim into a boat motor." End hilarious rant. Love her.


Jess tells Cece she needs to get rid of some of her stuff. Her phone rings and it's Becky telling her she needs to finish that budget by tomorrow or she's fired. Jess protests that it's a weeks worth of work to no avail. She has to get Cece to hurry so she can finish, so she goes through items asking if she'll keep or toss. Cece wants to keep everything, even the hat that "Sir-Miss-a Lot" wore. Heehee, yep, it's exactly what you think it means! Jess finally tricks her into going outside and locks her out, so she can pack everything up.


At the bar there's a flasher that's taken to coming in. Nick is completely unfazed about it, which weirds everyone else out. Schmidt calls Winston to come try and find him. Him and Dunston show up and Dunston is even more weird than Winston. He goes around in circles trying to find the bathroom and keeps re-asking where it is. He's also colorblind and he loses all strength in his hands at no particular time. He drinks coffee out of a sandwich bag.

Nick can't believe that he's the only one that's been flashed. Apparently he's been flashed "300 times." "Not even on like holidays? Not even like after the Olympics?"

Cece tricks Jess back inside the apartment and sees that all of her stuff is packed. She tells Jess she's actually freaked out about all the changes. She's scared of getting married and losing her apartment. Jess hugs her and then worries about her job. She then says never mind, let's just get drunk!


Winston and Dunston interview Nick about the flasher and he starts describing him. "He was average size, thin, wispy blonde hair, oddly shaped, kinda came to a point (Winston: "uh, what does that mean?") top heavy, bit of a scar, as if from a hook or something (Dunston: "gross."). You want me to describe his face and body look like?" Winston, Dunston and Schmidt all about die when they realize he wasn't talking about his face and body. "Have you been describing what his penis looks like the whole time?" Schmidt asks, disgusted and disturbed. Hahaha

While Jess and Cece are getting drunk, Becky calls wanting Jess to locate a page in the binder. She can't find it and she thinks she's accidentally packed it in Cece's stuff. Cece tells her she should quit that job, but Jess says she doesn't take leaps, she takes "small, planned steps, like an arthritic dog." Cece then brings out the note where Jess had written down the address for when she went to interview for her roommate spot. The phone rings and it's once again Becky. Cece answers it and tells her that Jess quits. "Nailed it!"


Winston and Dunston bungle getting the flasher and Aly saves the day by catching him. Winston tells her he wants her back as partner and she asks him why he left. He almost tells her he likes her, but he doesn't. Instead he says she hurt his feelings hating on his Pure Moods CD. Haha. They have a sweet moment and I know they are going to get together eventually. Someday Winston will get the girl! Someday!

Jess goes to Becky the next morning to apologize and say she's not quitting. When Becky begins to pile more of her work on her, she gets mad and quits after all.

Cece wakes up hungover and Schmidt is there. She admits that she's nervous about all of the changes and he tells her, "We'll be scared together, and we'll be really happy together too, and we'll be really annoyed together living with three other people and a cat." Awww, these two.

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