And that, my friends, is exactly how I feel about Mr. Robot right now. I ain’t even mad, I’m just gonna ride out the rest of season 1 and find out what’s really shaking.
Season finale time: there’s too much to say about what happened previously, and let’s be honest, I’m pretty sure it will be negated completely by this episode anyway. On that cheery note, let’s roll!
We’d left Tyrell and Elliot at the arcade, me and Elliot starting at the popping popcorn; me because I remember Darlene hiding the gun in there and Elliot maybe because he hasn’t ever eaten in the history of this show.
Remember Michael Hansen, Dr. Gordon’s mendacious boyfriend from the beginning of the season? Otherwise known as Flipper’s first daddeh? He’s meeting with Krista, and actually, it’s Lenny and he looks like shit. He’s lied to her AGAIN, telling her he was sick to get her there. He’s gone to the police about Elliot hacking him, they’ve been looking for Elliot for 6 weeks. I guess Elliot bringing Flipper to the vet is what triggered everything, Lenny’s pretending he cared about Flipper, the dog he used to lift up by the collar. We all know who Flipper’s real dad is.
Lenny is looking for information about Elliot and wants to prosecute. Dr. Gordon, don’t you dare…she does not.
Lenny returns home to his fast food supper to see the massive global hack and it’s ON!
Elliot is accosted in a parking lot and says “Who am I?’ when braced by a grouchy parking lot attendant. He’s been parked in Tyrell’s Escalade for two days and the credit card systems are down. He says he doesn’t trust us, his imaginary friends and BACKATCHA ELLIOT!
Oh man, Angela took the job at EvilCorp. fsociety is hard at work destroying evidence and Elliot executed all by himself and he can’t remember what happened to Tyrell and he keeps asking us and WHATEVER MAN.
We see a montage of articles about the hack, Elliot is reading up and then leaves, saying he told Darlene they shouldn’t have done this. But. I would say that he DID do it, but I’m sure it’s completely opposite from what it looks like.
Gideon is doing an asset review; they have nothing, no time, no money and they need to shut down. Gideon isn’t just a manager, he’s the owner and it’s looking beyond bleak. So now nobody has any debt, but nobody has any credit either. So unless anyone has cash..
Elliot is watching people and looking for Tyrell; he tells us all the data is GAWN. He finds Tyrell’s assistant who doesn’t know anything, but it distracted by an fsociety video claiming responsibility for the hack and data cleansing. People in fsociety masks watch in Times Square and also: fsociety. Um. That must be Tyrell, but HOW?
The Biggest Cheese at Evil Corp is having hair and makeup done; he’s a little edgy and climbs down Angela’s throat.
fsociety is at an animal shelter? Ahhhh they’re using the dead puppy oven to complete wipedown. *herk*. Man, what I got out of that is that Romero has a tonne of weed, so he doesn’t need money, and Trenton frees the puppy while The Ramones play.
Elliot is at Tyrell’s home, Joanna rolls up with her stroller and she doesn’t know where he is either. She offers to let him wait inside, saying she just heard from Tyrell: RUN ELLIOT!!!!
He can sense the crazy, though, and she’s already smelled it on him. She mutters something in Danish that the internets tell me is a death threat (“if you’ve hurt him, I will kill you) and RUN ELLIOT!! She’s a little all over the place: “you’re out of this family unless you fix this” then all Danish death threats. My god she’s beautiful, though, like Angelina Jolie back in the day before malnutrition and a rumoured heroin addiction came into play.
Evil Corp CEO James Plouffe (of the hair and makeup – is it wrong that I want to call him Ploof?) is sweating like a hewer in church on camera. He starts with the usual platitudes but breaks into truff: it’s gorgeous really. Oh no oh no oh no and he shoots himself on live TV.
Angela is in the lobby, still with Plouffe’s blood on her shoes; Sadist Bigger Cheese approaches her with empathy. I do not trust and I still wish violence upon him. He recognises her as Terry Colby’s hire and asks her to attend, giving her money for new shoes. OH COME ON!!!! RANT BREAK: disregard if you aren’t as frustrated as I am.
Angela JUST joined Evil Corp, which is improbable enough, given that she’s currently SUING EVIL CORP, and now, wonder of wonders, she just HAPPENS to be there when the CEO offs himself on live TV, resulting in her being invited to the all-important press conference; when her presence will undoubtedly affect Elliot and fsociety?? Aren’t there supposed to be hundreds of thousands of Evil Corp employees? COME THE FCUK ON BRIDGET!! Rant over, as you were.
Elliot is searching Tyrell’s car for clues, growing increasingly frantic. He finds sunglasses that contain a flash drive and starts shouting into the ether. Losing it…
Darlene is trying to mobilize the team for the End of the World Party, they’re not impressed. Also odd: Mobley is the DJ and I would not have guessed he was especially musically inclined.
Elliot plugs in the flash drive, to find a video of himself sitting alone on the rail, presumably jumping off. He thinks this means he is on the hook for everything and has to push Edward into playing his hand. He dials the police and ooh! Up pops Edward, just as expected. I guess it’s cool that you can just video your triggers like that for special occasions. I could probably do the same with Lovelace, but pass. Hard pass.
Angela is buying new shoes, and hey! The shore store clerk knows both exactly who she is and how her shoes got dirty. OH COME ON!!!!!! She WASN’T EVEN ON CAMERA!!!
Shoe Store Clerk is an anarchist, I gather and it gives us a chance to see Angela work out the recent disintegration of her moral fibre. He’s her conscience, clearly. As a side note, I think it’s pretty fcuking rich that a guy selling $600 shoes to ridiculous women with narrow feet thinks he has room to talk about moral fibre. Shut up and bring her the Pradas, ahole!
Elliot is choking himself in the coffee shop, trying to work out how to convince himself to tell himself where Tyrell is
and Edward says he’s losing it and the line of the night: I was only supposed to be your prophet; you’re supposed to be my god.
Awww, how surprising, Angela has shown up for the press conference after all! Bigger Cheese offers her answers: she wants to know why he seems so confident. He says: people did this. It’s not aliens or zombies or Zeus, just people. And people can fix it. He has a huge conglomerate behind him and the weight of that usually cracks things.
She asks why she’s there, and we know, of course. He’s using her to get to Elliot and Darlene. He just says she’s young and refreshing and I sure hate the smell of bullshit more than she does. Bigger Cheese is glad poor old Plouffe killed himself this morning; he was weak and everyone will benefit from him not being present. Told you that guy was a bad guy.
At the End of The World Party, Darlene is grooving to Ol’ Dirty Bastard, but the rest of fsociety is skeptical.
More delusions for Elliot, Edward and his psycho mom and WHERE IS TYRELL?? Cue Christian Slater Kingdom of Bullshit rant.
Elliot has to give up control to his dad’s ghost, he listens carefully to the words in his head and returns home to watch the detritus and chaos of his actions while this plays: Sound and Colour: Alabama Shakes
But it’s not over! After credits we see a limosine pulling up to a fancy house; a man walks in ahead of us and…it looks like B.D. Wong out of drag. He’s meeting with Bigger Cheese, he was involved all along. It IS B.D. Wong, and he makes a reference to Nero playing the lyre while Rome burned…and his watch beeps. It is done.
So. We’ve lost Tyrell somewhere, mebbe somewhere with what’s left of Elliot’s mind; Whiterose and the Dark Army are quite closely associated with EvilCorp and I guess it would be tricky to estimate where their true motive lies; Angela is ridiculously involved and DJMobley at least understands the beauty of Hey, Dirty, Baby I Got Your Money.
Deuces, ScriptKiddies.
