Welcome back to Wentworth Correctional, where our interim Top Dog has compassion and cancer cells in unfortunately equal measure. I do love Maxie so, I hope there’s a way oot for her. Rolling S4E6 Divide and Conquer after the break.

We open at Dory (Shareena Clanton) and Nash (Luke McKenzie) enjoying their first chance at horizontal relations, woot! How odd to think you have pledged to spend your life with someone you don’t even know and share something as important as a child to raise. You haven’t even seen his wobblies up close, Dory!

Things seem to be going the right way for a smacked bottom; we switch to seeing Bea (Danielle Cormack) being let out of the slot by Mr. Will Jackson (Robbie J. Magasiva) which is appropriate since she’s in there for beating the shite out of him. He doesn’t look like he’s holding a grudge, but he doesn’t know what she’s become either. Yay! Maxine (Socratis Otto) is finally able to go: go gurl! Get that cancer treatment!

Oh good, Bea and Allie (Kate Jenkinson) are looking at each other in an entirely different way

APPROVE!

I’m glad Dory and Nash are having this great sex, I just don’t understand why there’s a sheet involved the whole time?

Bea meets newbie Tasha (Frankie Adams) of the pressed DURESS button, Liz (Celia Ireland) leaves out the part where Maxine went her own way and didn’t punish Tasha for her CHOOSING TO NOT BE RAPED.

Maxine is getting the very bad news about her prognosis; she’s no longer eligible for the drugs trial. Wait. How long was that delay? Like two days? At any rate, now her only option is a double mastectomy and aggressive chemotherapy. Ahhgghvhv k so no hair and no bewbs!! I bet that means even more to a trans person.

Kaz (Tammy McIntosh, who’s wrinkles give me LIFE: show your age, woman! I love seeing more than Barbie dolls with preternaturally smooth faces) has to ask: is Allie back on the gear? No and she thinks Joan Ferguson (Pamela Rabe) is the one who did the planting. I think it was brilliant, personally, look how close Bea and Allie are suddenly! And that IS how it happens, thanks Ferg!

Kaz doesn’t see that, she thinks Ferguson is one of them. Oh Kaz. Allie is still her number one, givvus a hug!

Ferguson waits until Allie’s off before approaching Kaz; she should jump into the power void now that Bea’s lost her grip a little. She suggests Kaz “divide and conquer.”

I love watching Ferguson out in the yard, she really is exactly like a lioness on the hunt, smelling the wind and looking for subtle shifts in her prey.

She starts with Boomer (Katrina Milosevic), picking at her speech to throw her off balance then making her move, praising her work with Maxine.

Lucy / Juice (Sally-Ann Upton) wants her pound of flesh, peez! JEEZ I said that before I heard her say those exact words, I can SEE THE FUTURE!! Lucy challenges Bea: if she doesn’t do something about Tasha, she and “the boys” will. Bea pushes back, she’ll decide on something. How is Juice still alive? Honestly? She’s gotten beaten to snot, fallen down the stairs in a wheelchair, SOMEONE put that rapey bastage out of my misery!

What kind of creative solution can Bea come up with? Maybe she could spitball with Allie over it? She needs to do something other than mimic Franky and Jacs. Bea and Allie get a nice little smile in, I like happy Bea!

The new guard Jake (Bernard Curry) comes and gets Liz for the Governor, what can Vera (Kate Atkinson) want? She’s not in trouble, whew, the police are looking for information about a homicide case. They want Liz to go all jailhouse informant! Well, she did lag…and that’s what Liz thinks too, she’s being targeted because of that. I immediately thought it might be a good way for Liz to get out of there earlier, that comes up at the end, as Liz is leaving.

Juice isn’t waiting for Bea’s solution; she, Stella (Bessie Holland) and the boys drag Tasha off to the bathroom right off to “train” the urge to push the DURESS button out of her. It’s unbelievable to me that she thinks she can operate with impunity like that; just then Bea walks in. She’s not there to help, though, she has a shiv! What’s she doing with that??

Everything went fine with Dory and Nash, of course, the pillow talk runs to his not finding a job yet and ohhhhhh a (female) friend of his has offered him space at her house. I call bullshit on Dory’s instant positive response: gurl, you’re in prison and some strange woman just offered your hot boyfriend and your child a place to stay. HONESTLY.

Dory tells the women. Boomer and me are on the same page, especially after all the “she’s really good with kids” shite

You can’t trust anyone! Nobody! Dory’s all worried now, AS SHE SHOULD BE. You don’t know this woman, you don’t even know your own boyfriend, nobody should be telling you this: THAT’S your baby!! Honestly.

Everyone’s distracted by Juice and gang chanting snitch and trashing someone in the yard, is that Tasha? Oh JFC, Dory jumps in there to protect her, it’s Tasha with her hair all cut off and bloody, I guess Bea didn’t scalp her properly. That poor fucking kid.

You see?

You see why this show is impossible? Tasha, on her first day, was left alone with a gang of rapists who were intent on assaulting her and when she protected herself LIKE YOU WOULD. SHE is the one due punishment and derision? This whole thing Bea said about Juice being in trouble if they HAD raped Tasha? WHAT HAPPENED TO THEM AFTER THEY GANGED FERGUSON? Sweet.fuck.all. So none of this makes sense to me.

Bea takes responsibility; she’s GOT to find another way!

Bea defends her decision to Dory; Tasha’s hair will grow back. There had to be some kind of punishment but did there? Did there really? Bea stomps off to find out what’s taking Maxine so long in Medical while Boomer says what she’s been thinking; Maxine would never have burned her hands.

It’s as though Bea’s forgotten that she only attained power by being different than the status quo; it wasn’t just the anti-drug stance, it was the compassion people felt FOR her. She killed Jacs because Jacs stood for everything she is doing right now. She’s forgotten that.

She questions Maxine about her results before going for blood about how she handled the DURESS button pushing; Maxine doesn’t share her news and doesn’t understand why Bea is so angry.

Vera and Dept. Gov. Jackson DO know the results, though, they’re discussing when Jake sticks his head in. Vera asks Will to stay and that is a very good call, Vera. He understand what happened out in the yard; he suggests they “unpick” the Top Dog hierarchy in the prison. Vera and Will think having a single point of contact is a good thing, however, they can work with Bea, so why would they?

I don’t think Bea has that power any more. I would absolutely support a move to Maxine as Top Dog, but of course: she isn’t physically up to it. I’d just like Bea to have a chance at some happiness with Allie; can’t she just go do that and leave all this prison-running to Maxine?

I am interested in this unpicking business, though, what would that look like?

Dory’s calling Nash, who isn’t picking up. Dun dun DUN!!!

Ohhh we finally meet the fabled Gary (Simon Maiden)! He’s come to see Maxine at her request and looks suuuuper nervous. He offers to pay her medical bills straight off, but that’s not why she’s here. She wants him to check with his sister about having the baby they’d talked about. Gary can’t believe his ears. Maxine stabbed him with a pair of scissors! You can’t come back from that! His sister isn’t having Maxine’s baby! He’s cruel and Maxine is devastated; Kaz watches and finally feels some empathy for the awesome Maxie.

Ah but is she? She follows Maxine out of the Visitor’s Lounge and offers her support. Is she taking Ferguson’s advice and dividing and conquering? Dory’s listening, stepping in to ask about Kaz’s outside contacts. Hmm

Ferguson explains this all in the kitchen later; Dory’s faith in Bea is eroding and if Kaz can pick up another supporter…

Liz is meeting Don Kaplan (Steve Bastoni) who is adorable and a homicide detective; he’s got a very easygoing manner that draws Liz in. Dangit, I bet myself earlier that the body they’re looking for in the investigation is a child and it looks as though I’m right. Not directly, but they think Sonia Stevens (Sigrid Thornton) killed her best friend, and the best friend’s kiddos would like to know where their mum’s body is. And Liz would be eligible for immediate parole, what? Me and Liz

Immediate?? Gurl. Doooooo it!! This lagger business is shite!

Tasha’s waited until everyone is gone to search for food; Jake approaches her and sells the soft soap about helping her if she just tells him who… Tasha’s haircut did it’s work, she knows he can’t help her. She did this to herself. Dory comes in and insists she come out to the yard, I sure hope she keeps a better eye on her than she did the first day.

Kaz’s got Dory’s information already; Nash is shacked up with a Miranda Watson (Janine Atwill) AND another kiddo. Ohhhh that’s Nash’s ex-girlfriend, and that’s HIS other kiddo. That is not good news. Dory calls and he hangs up on her, Dory, get your kiddo. Have Joshie sent to stay with your sister.

Out in the yard, of course Dory isn’t taking care of Tasha, who is being approached by several people, warned away by Ferguson, who is bearing gifts. She’s brought a hair scarf; I keep forgetting that Tasha doesn’t know Ferguson’s history. Ferguson notes the scar on Tasha’s neck; she tried to top herself last time she was locked up and I’m sure Ferguson will find a way to use that. She’s in full form, mimicking Tasha’s speech patterns and using a lot of uncharacteristic hand movements. She’s fully befriended Tasha before she knows it; preying on her fears of the women, pointing out that Dory is nowhere around. This made me laugh

But that’s it, Ferguson’s hook is set. Is she trying to get Tasha to kill herself?

Liz notices how upset Tasha is back in HBlock, but she doesn’t up, distracted by the televised appeal of the two children in the case she’s been asked to help with. She’s such a soft touch.

Kaz gets something from CO Miles (Jacqueline Brennan) and passes them on to Dory: it’s pictures of Nash and his ex. They look happy! Bea doesn’t when she sees that Dory went to Kaz instead of her, she’s not to ever do that again, right? She looked so hurt for a moment there.

Liz is in to see dishy Detective Don Kaplan, she wants to confirm that the kids she saw were involved in that case? She called him by his first name, oh ho! He is very good with people. She’s tired of getting involved with other people’s crap but he convinces her she won’t be alone in this.

Ah so at least Nash has come to see Dory; it seems he only just found out that his daughter is autistic and that’s why he’s been having to spend time with his ex-girlfriend and he didn’t tell Dory because they probably would have spend most of the conjugal talking about that instead of trying to see their own brains. But. He didn’t bring Joshie. WHY wouldn’t be bring Joshie? Why did he leave Joshua with Miranda and not bring him to see his mum in prison?? She needs to think about whether she can do this.

Oh man, Tasha did take Ferguson’s words to heart and she is planning to kill herself. She weaves herself a rope and it’s Dory who finds the evidence, if not Tasha. She’s gone to the shower; that’s where she plans to do it and find her, Dory! Ferguson finds her first, saving Tasha’s life and staring at Dory the entire time.

Boomer and Dory make a run at Maxine in the yard: they’ve been thinking that she would be much better in charge, yeah? She finally has to tell them: she can’t because she has cancer. Hand hugs!

Allie finds Bea in her cell, she’s been cutting the inside of her thigh quite a lot lately. Bea can’t cover it in time, watching Allie tend to Bea is so sweet. Finally Bea can be vulnerable.

Jake blames himself for Tasha’s suicide attempt, interesting. Vera should know better, she knows the Suicide Whisperer is out in the yard. Ferguson JUST did that to Jodie Spiteri, Vera should have remembered that. Their meeting is over because newbie Sonia Stevens has arrived; time to work, Liz!

Sonia is gloriously overdressed and completely unimpressed with Vera

Kaz leads the women in a round of applause for Ferguson, who managed to goad a young woman to the precipice of death, then pull her back from it for accolades. Bravo, Ferguson.

Sonia seems to think Liz is her helper; much like Judy King on Orange is the New Black, handing over her laundry basket of clothes and calling her Elizabeth. Liz hates being called Elizabeth, and Sonia calling not having children dodging a bullet pushes her over the edge into one last glorious final lag. She’ll do it, Don!

Bea confronts Maxine: does she think she’s going to take over? Ahhh Bea doesn’t know about Maxine’s diagnosis, or that the delay she insisted on had such an impact. Dory listens as Maxine finally LOSES it, thank the gods and the wee boarlets. Bea apologizes

Jake thanks Vera for being so understanding (and arm-squeezy) when he was upset, just as I’m wondering if he’s straight after all, he leans over and plants a deep one on her. I legit just made a “whuuuuuuut” noise during that whole kiss.

Oh and it’s all changed by time for lunch; it gets deathly silent when Bea walks in and she doesn’t understand why Boomer is loading a tray for Maxine. Dory calls her out for ALL the women, she’s just not there for them. Bea protests, but Dory’s had enough, she takes her tray and moves to Kaz and Ferguson’s table.

I mean

Dory is seated NEXT to Ferguson. How can she be that stupid? DOES NOBODY ON THIS SHOW HAVE A MEMORY LONGER THAN THEIR HAIR?? I always knew Dory was a capricious, immature woman but I didn’t think she was a twat. And we’re out. I was really hoping Allie would get up and walk over to Bea’s table, but no luck so far. Until next time, you guys, I am doing my best to suspend disbelief, but the fact that Ferguson is welcomed, listened to, completely healed AND calling the shots after this or any amount of time? Yeah. Cheers!