Hello! We left Below Deck on a watery cliffhanger, will the unruly guest get out of the water? Will Captain Less Rosbach regain his cool? He was MAD. Let's find out in my recap of Below Deck S8:E11 Blood in the Water after the break!
To sum up, we've got "boat people" co-Primaries Tina and Mark Milani aboard, they brought along a bunch of boat people friends, including one Delores Flora. Delores is a drinker, to put it mildly, and we ended last episode with her jumping in the water after supper late at night soused to the gills.
Captain Lee Rosbach ain't having it.
He plans to kick them ALL off in the morning, but first he needs to make sure Delores doesn't get back in the water so he radios bosun Eddie Lucas for a deckhand to stay up all night outside Delores' door.
Chief steward Francesca Rubi and Eddie work on a schedule; sick deckhand Isabel 'Izzy' Wouters hears all the radio chatter and comes to find out what's going down.
Hey! Reminder! This is March 1. A thousand people have already died in Italy by this point but they're not steeped in COVID awareness like we are now, so nobody is worried about Izzy's sore throat, tiredness and general feeling of being off. Except me, I'm very worried because Izzy has an immune system disorder and this is all the bad news. HOWEVER, she could just have a cold. I could be overreacting becoz: see also: steeped in awareness.
Deckhand James Hough is far too busy flirting with third steward Elizabeth Frankini to worry about a guest drowning, awwww. He totally would stay up all night with Elizabeth and hang out, though, she's down too.
Instead of asking these keeners, Francesca and Eddie go wake all the sleeping crew members so they can do a shift too.
For the record: Delores is not cowed, she don't curr what Captain Lee says and she'd do it again. She's gone through the Wooooo stage to Sad to Belligerent.
James and Elizabeth repair to the cabin he shares with Izzy to hang a bunch of blankets and make thumping noises. GUYS. You just kissed for the first time last night! Rob and Jess from Below Deck Med waited two whole weeks and by that time they were already married!! Like, practically.
Sick Izzy tries to go to bed, but James has marked their cabin a no-go zone so she grabs her pjs and a blanket and heads to Elizabeth's bed to sleep.
And then five minutes later, Elizabeth goes back to her own room and we switch all around again. I mean.
It's bright and early the next morning before we know it, Captain Lee has been thinking all night. He said he was ending this whole charter last night, but has had some time to calm himself down. He is for sure kicking off Delores, he's not sure about the rest.
Primaries Tina and Mark are the first up, steward Ashling Lorger greets them for a second before Francesca swoops in and drags them off to see Captain Lee. They were expecting that. Captain Lee has decided: as long as they kick Delores off, they can stay. But she absolutely has to go now.
She agrees, packing her bag while other guests mutter quietly about being cut off and what? You got more booze than you knew what to do with, what are you talking about?
The Delores jumps off the tender.
WHAT YOUR FRIENDS SAYING NOW??
Elizabeth is all cheery and rested when she gets up, but Francesca is foaming at the mouth when she hears of the musical beds the night before. She's going back to Captain Lee to demand firing rights over Elizabeth.
First she has to serve breakfast to our now-meek charter guests, they don't want to get kicked off the boat. It's very muted compared to last night where they demanded all the activities to happen concurrently in the water. Eddie and Francesca love it!
James and Izzy stand next to each other in silence and see? This is why Harry told Sally men and women could never be friends. Because Izzy's reaction is disproportionate to what happened, meaning she's probably more attracted to James than she lets on and omigod I now finally understand why grown adults never wanted to hear my dating stories.
One of the guests, Karen of course, crashes her jetski into the other jetskis then blames it on James not throwing her a line. And their attitude from last night is back, woooo! They head off to ride horses on the beach while James and deckhand RobNeedsALastName make up stories of what could have happened to the jetski.
They're definitely best bros.
Chef Rachel Hargrove is super excited about the seafood extravaganza planned for tonight, she even loves the word extravaganza! I miss when I could just enjoy her over the top enthusiasm about her food and in general.
I've talked before about Elizabeth's disconnect and how it affects how she works, this is what I'm talking about:
Just before that, the ironing table fell down. Did you see what she did? She thought about her reaction first and that slowed everything down.
By this point in the season, usually everyone has forgotten there are cameras and camerapeople lurking literally everywhere, but it doesn't look as though she has.
The guests get back from horseback riding on the beach with enough recovered nerve to ask the Captain to join them for supper, he agrees. It's never a good idea to hold a grudge.
Eddie and Francesca call James and Elizabeth up on deck for a Come to Jeebus meeting; it's about to go down! (Like James)
Okay, no, Francesca yells a bit but Eddie's heart's not in it and I don't think James and Elizabeth are listening anyway, too busy making moooooo eyes at each other.
James asks Elizabeth to go for a drink after charter, awww. Maybe he's not a fkboi after all!
The guests dress for dinner while Rachel murders crustaceans and I contemplate veganism again.
Francesca hears that Elizabeth's feet are tired during service and sends her for a break. But when Elizabeth takes that break with James...
Let's go over this one time, for the seats in the back. Francesca hears Elizabeth complain, says: take a break. Elizabeth says: no, I'm good, I just want to get stuff done. Francesca insists: you should go now, it's the perfect time. Elizabeth: I dunno...Francesca: take a break if you need it *exeunt*
Fifteen minutes later: YOU SHOULD HAVE TOLD ME YOU WERE TAKING A BREAK.
The guests don't stay up late, everyone's in bed by a decent hour and now I'm wondering if they're ACTUALLY boat people after all!
Izzy is up early for her shift in the morning, but she's been feeling steadily worse so Eddie sends her back to bed. When Eddie notifies Captain Lee, he moves to isolate her from the rest of the crew.
WHEN is someone going to connect any of those dots? I know back then the primary Coronavirus focus was on travelers, but they're on a YACHT. That is only traveling!
The guests pack as Eddie prepares to dock with only three people on deck. They're staying in blue polos, they need to be able to move fast and the dress whites are more constrictive.
A smooth docking later, everyone is in dress whites and ready to wash a clean boat for cash!
A nice speech and a fat tip envelope later, we're washing the boat, let's count some money!
You know it's never going to be a good tip when the guests take every last piece of candy and point out how much their tip is and this is no exception. They got $16,790 USD, which is almost $1,400 USD each. Okay!
That's...crap. But at least they're gone?
And Captain Lee is giving them a whole day off! He's sending them to a spa called Catherine's (sp?) to eat, drink and be merry. ENJOY IT. You're seconds away from your first COVID case and you don't even know it.
James and Elizabeth gets fancy and head out for supper (enjoy that too!! While you CAN); they look so pretty! They order...Long Island Iced Teas. How are those still around?? Those were around when I partied in my 20s, when dinosaurs roamed the earth and every fourth woman was named either Shelley or Jennifer.
Then he orders a B-52! If someone gets a Cherry Whiskey shot I'm tapping out because I clearly have a stalker.
The rest of the gang stays on the boat and plays Truth or Dare. What the. Eddie brays like a...donkey? Wee goat? Yoga?
Elizabeth and James sneak back on My Seanna and sneak into a guest room, do they think no one will notice? More moaning and then it's morning and they sneak back into their bunks, with nobody the wiser. High five! Or as Elizabeth would say: "oh YEAH!"
Izzy begs to come along on the crew day off, Eddie says it's okay to go spread her germs around as long as she stays horizontal.
No, I haven't had my brain messed with by COVID at all, why do you ask??
Rachel is still loaded, so the boys watch which cab she gets in before committing to the other, she's impossible when loaded. She drinks steadily throughout the day as James and Izzy make up, it's about to get loud.
This is BEFORE 2:30 pm.
She ends up on stage, rudely directing the musicians and embarassing herself to the point that Francesca goes up to remove her. There are only two rules on Captain Lee's boat:
Rachel's broken BOTH.I am so glad there was so little photographic evidence of my shenanigans when I was being Rachel. Be well, Extreme Moods Chef.
Until next time, when a mysterious illness sweeps the Interior crew and we finally send for a doctor. Cheers.