Hi there! I checking out the new series Car Share suggested by EB on Twitter, honestly, she knows ALL the good shows, she put me onto Fleabag and everything. This looks very funny and has been green-lit for another season, so let’s get right into it!
John (Peter Kay) is driving all over town in an adorable red car arguing with his GPS. Wait, what do they call it in the UK…Sat-Nav! He’s arguing with his extremely polite Sat-Nav and I have have these EXACT same arguments with my GPS! You can’t do a u-turn in the middle of the road and the “the route is being calculated” every three seconds every time you switch the wheel slightly to the left is enough to drive you mad. Not to mention
He’s picking up Kayleigh (Sian Gibson), who is slightly nervous: she’s never been in the car with a stranger! Not that he’s a, er, lets listen to music! Forever FM must figure in the story, since we get a lovely screenshot of it and all. John is not a fan, but they BOTH end up singing along to “Martika’s Kitchen” which made me spend 15 minutes down a Google rabbithole involving Martika of “Toy Soldiers” fame. I grew up in the 80s, you understand. That song was written by Prince!
Their car-sharing is a new work initiative to save the environment and parking spaces at work; that sounds solid! Except when your new friend shoves her oversize water bottle into the cupholder and you end up covered in watered-down juice.
Except
It’s not watered down anything, well, maybe, technically, but no: it’s her urine sample with the top left open and its in his mouth.
He’s got a replacement shirt, fanks, but I think he might cry
Lots of traffic, hey, this part of England looks like any other big city! Kayleigh tries to engage John in conversation while holding his pee-soaked clothes up to the vents: has he done any vacationing? Yes, Malta with his ex, which she immediately assumes he means a man. He LOSES it, it all goes back to a company Christmas party where he got up and sang, and he couldn’t be more right: “the world’s gone mad when a man can’t dance to Gloria Gaynor without being accused of being an homosexual” except for the part where he’s making out that being a homosexual is something to be accused of, like stealing yogurt in the lunchroom or removing tags from new pillows.
OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
He dresses on the side of the road and guess what song plays?? “I Love To Love” by Tina Charles from River!!! I miss River. I miss River so much, it was just brilliant, one of the very best things I’ve seen Nicola Walker in and Stellan Skarsgard is FANTASTIC. I may have rewound that part. And then looked it up on YouTube and mightily resisted the urge to post it here.
More personal chitchat, sweet-and-sour pee smelling John’s not in the mood to discuss his ex further, please and thanks, Kayleigh! She’s online dating, it’s a last resort for “women of her age.” Which is 36. She’s feeling her biological clock ticking, though, if her aging eggs don’t get “spurted on” soon they’ll be “woopsed”(?).
He’s still complaining about the smell, so she sprays him with her perfume, MUCH better! Hey, “Losing My Religion” by REM is on now, yay! They’re at work now, meeting Ted who wrangles trolleys in the parking lot and still has John’s shovel.
Kayleigh is off with a “see you in a wee while” pointing her bottle at him, HAHAHAHA
The ads on the radio almost need their own recaps! Did you know a shed can sure depression?? We need new sheds from the Shed Surgery! Or a shag, suggests John, which makes more sense…
Kayleigh can do impressions! Cilla Black and Miss Piggy for starters, you wait!
John’s appraisal went well, they’re gonna move him up and he’s been put in charge of Christmas. Kayleigh is SO EXCITED, she loves Christmas! She obnoxiously sings Christmas songs in his face and grasping his extra chin, get out of it! He can’t stand people singing in his face! It goes back to childhood or you know, COMMON SENSE.
Kayleigh manages to drag out some information about his dating history; he met Charlotte on the train, which is very romantic she thinks, like Source Code with Jake Gyllenhaall and Michelle Monaghan.
Tangent!! I saw Source Code on my first night out away from my very first baby, I had what I know now is a panic attack and couldn’t stop crying and I think I tried to climb under my seat before hiding in the washroom until it was over. Hormones are incredibly powerful and completely suck arse sometimes.
Side tangent: I’ve never forgiven Michelle Monaghan for her portrayal of one of my favourite characters ever: Angie Gennaro in Gone Baby Gone, but I’ve since realised it’s not her fault she was so miscast. I now blame the producers.
Oh
Wait: I am thinking of Shia LeBeouf in Eagle Eye not Source Code, as you were. It still had Michelle Monaghan, and apparently I get Jakey G mixed up with Shia LeStank instead of Bradley Cooper, as Kayleigh does.
John’s annoyed, she asked about his romantic life and then goes off on a tangent trying to remember who she gets Jake Gyllenhaal mixed up with (Bradley Cooper! See above), I bet that IS frustrating. People talking too much and always going off on tangents. Sounds rough.
Kayleigh was a drugs mule once! For an ex-boyfriend that she conducted a campaign of terror against after. She even Alanis Morissette’d him! You know, parked outside his place and blasted “You Oughta Know” which she demonstrates. I laughed out loud when she censored herself as per the radio edit
Hey! Narrow boats! Is Red Production Company involved in this show?? And then Kayleigh is in her head in a music video and it looks fun!
Awwww, they’ve already bonded, HR emailed to find out if they wanted to switch up their car sharing and they decide to keep each other instead of getting a new body each to ride with. It’s very sweet. At drop off, they already have jokes for each other!
And we’re out. I love John! Kayleigh is growing on me, but she gets all the tough sells: like a urine sample in a water bottle with an open sport top. Until next time, you lot, thanks again EB!
