We’re back with our Cowboys4Angels in sunny Las Vegas! Rolling Showtime’s Gigolos S6 epi 6 after the break!

Straight to Date Night! Bradley is taking his new ladyfriend on a limo ride, it’s prom night all over again! I bet someone gets lucky! Bradley makes fun of himself (but yay, he got rid of the Wolverine beard! He, sir, was no Wolverine) as Lexi introduces herself:

She’s a 43-year old critical care nurse from the Seattle area. Hey, I know loads of people from the Seattle area! Well, “know.” Do you “know” Lindy West and Joel McHale too?? She’s recently divorced, and it was noooottttt amicable. Her hubs left her after twenty years of marriage and 3 kids for her friend / triathalon coach and she is not over it whatsoever. She’s got a kiddo graduating in June, so I’m wondering a little bit about this prom setup, for reals. She’s in this short flowered strap dress, and there’s champagne in the limo and Bradley…She wants Bradley to listen, not be all weird and have their own baggage, LISTEN TO JUST HER BAGGAGE, BRADLEY, and I would totally pay for that.

He goes the usual route; do all nurses and EMTs get asked the weirdest thing they’ve ever seen in the hospital? I bet they do. Since we’re in this secksi secksi I’m-totally-sure-scotchguarded limo, I’m sure the convo is gonna revolve around who stuck what where and tried to play it off as a fall. Tabasco bottle makes no sense to me or Bradley, but he’s really phoning this date in. He seems tahred; are you working too much, Mr. Lords? You’re not even looking at her!

Okay, there will be no promnight shenanigans in the limo, Lexi has a new place to bring her Boyfriend Experience (they’ve both used that term several times), it’s an investment property! I’m guessing she did all right in the divorce, minus the you know, being left for a friend.

Time for cuddles! I’m sure glad Bradley is cut, because he’s practically sleepwalking on this date. Maybe he’s working out too much! They throw down in the usual way, very usual, ifyouknowwhatImean, Bradley may as well be a Missionary in the Church of Wolverine, I’ve not seen much else. That’s perfectly fine with Lexi, who says Bradley is highly in tune with what a woman needs and adjusting as necessary, and maybe because I’ve seen every episode of this show (what?? we said we wouldn’t judge!) I would say he just does the same thing every time and allllls the women just focus on the abs and banana-hanger ginch. I could be wrong. It’s built her self-esteem though, so yay!

I’ve heard the show is scripted and I can see how that would be possible, but I hope it’s not. I hope a critical care nurse from the Seattle area just out of a shocking divorce found her way to see herself as a sexual being again. I hope that. Being cheated on is life-altering and I dig that she found a way to own her power again.

Oh not so typical today! Bradley’s picked Lexi up and they’re up against the wall, and then he’s phoning it in on the bed and then she’s a cowgirl and then we’re back to where we started. Around the world, just like in town!

Oh for the love of. Nick’s making music again, but not “rapping” like he usually does, but singing on a country song. Y’all know he just did that for the hat, right? Nick’s paid asked local music star Justin Mathers to “collaborate” with him on writing a country song

Justin’s just in it for the shine powder and hair-degreaser, you know that, right? He’s played the Palms, and opened for Gregg Allman, he says, he’s done some big things, and…*embarrassed look* oh noooooos. Everyone has to pay the bills, Justin, there’s no shame in that game, getcha name out there.

They warm up with some vocal exercises while the producer turns off the feed to the booth. Nick wanted to record this song “Everyone’s Got A Little Country In Them” to show I don’t know, I tuned out. It’s really bad, y’all. He’s tried to expand the reach of the song by randomly throwing in the words Hong Kong and Peru. He also can’t sing, which Justin figures out toute suite. He wants to just talk in a deep voice, which is…kinda like his “rapping”, right? Justin’s earning that dough, yo. This does point out how difficult it is to be a singer, though, Justin’s got a great voice and I bet Nick thought he sounded fantastic until he got up against that. It’s a reality check.

Vin’s meeting his brother Forrest to play some beach volleyball. He’s a professor of Sociology in Chicago, investigating why Americans don’t like anything different. He’s adorable, and while I don’t think he and Vin look alike, they have the exact same laugh and it’s hilarious.

They’re super competitive, and used to play volleyball together daily. Forrest went off to develop the next stage of his career, but Vin was pretty happy to stay doing software development and playing volleyball on this side. Vin doesn’t lack for brains at all, but he’s not the most ambitious guy on this show.

Moar Nick “singing” country music with Justin paying his bills, yo. I’m not really sure, I was uploading pics.

Next up we have a Brace Date! This is 48-year-old Billie, who’s retired and living out in the desert by herself.

Billie’s from Oregon and I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that maybe not all those years were good years. She’s inherited this house and has been finding herself kind of overwhelmed with all the house upkeep and LOL Brace’s there to do a HoneyDo list. Hahahahaha. That’s exactly the only thing I’d hire Brace for too! He used to work for General Motors and got into gigoloing to NOT have to be a handyperson any more, since he seems to not understand how ladders work, I’d say that was a good move.

He’s dusting blinds, and carrying on, but the pool is the real problem; it’s a swamp. If you can’t maintain your pool, or pay someone to, drain that sumbitch and make an really big planter out of it. Bacteria hothouse!!

Brace’s fixing the plumbing while Billie hovers creepily in the background, pulling his ginch down and saying it’s time to fix HER plumbing. Brace is very relieved. Billie just needs a man’s man!

Bow chick a wow wow time! Yay more non-conventional body types! That’s all that can be said about that.

We’re having a boy coffee klatch at Brace’s house; he’s discovered a new music artist! Let’s listen to Nick’s song AGAIN. I mean. Vin and I have nothing nice to say at all, so we just shake our heads and maybe upload some more pictures. Bradley cautions Nick to maybe go hang out with some folks from the country before he records another song…Vin mentions gospel, making his own self laugh, and we’re oot!

Did you know Richard Greico executive produces this show??? How can we not LEAP to conclusions about that?? Until next time, keep your plumbing crack covered and your neglected pool drained!