Welcome back to a whole lot of trippiness on Mr. Robot. Yaaayyy

Thank jeebus for Previously On, I was completely distracted by all the preggo-bondage with Tyrell and his wife two episodes ago; I missed the part where they talked about the new CTO candidate Scott Knowles. Joanna (the missus SwedishPsycho) had suggested they have the Knowless’ over for supper toute suite. She’s a team player, I’ll give her that.

We’re in jail with Fernando’s crew; his bunkie thinks he’s in The Great Escape and 5 bucks says Nando makes him eat that rubber ball. Fernando’s lawyer is not encouraging; you know who told Nando to put all his bidness on social media? His little brother! Side note: tumblr is IMPOSSIBLE. As you were. Fernando gets all metaphysical with his blah ain’t nobody can judge me blah blah but the universe blah blah schtick, but the real point of this meeting is to let Nando know that there was an anonymous tip. You know he knows who THAT was.

Mr. Robot walks into his local hipster coffee joint, I spend all my time he is onscreen trying to figure out if he exists or not. People do seem to notice him, nodding at him, and he lifts something from someone even. That someone was a Steel Mountain employee, and what he lifted was his swipe badge peep. And they make it onto the grounds of the Impenetrable Steel Mountain and I know that’s supposed to be reassuring, but all I see is a big old target.

Elliot thinks he’s a good judge of people and their weaknesses, what he calls “exploits”. I understand, but I think he could maybe do well to turn some of that insight inward. And we get names!!! Silent Bob is actually Mobely!

Elliot says he’s a glutton and lacks discipline from his urges. Also Merle is Romero, a know-it-all who moonlights as a hypochondriac. I didn’t get that, but maybe Elliot’s spent more time with him.

They’re going after Bill Harper as their first exploit target: he can get them into Level 1. His supervisor Wendy will get them to level two, where they can install the Raspberry Pie and Bob’s your uncle! Speaking of vulnerabilities, Elliot figures Mr. Robot’s is that he is insane and I would argue that in this sitch: that’s a strength. Also, I don’t think Elliot can realistically be throwing around any MI stones, know what I mean? We’re his imaginary friends!

Elliot is inside and his black hoodie of doom (pulled up, natch) marks him as out of place in the glistening lobby as clearly as if he was carrying a large sign saying “EMO HACKER. PAY NO ATTENTION”.

Awww, Elliot HAS turned that searing gaze inwards and identified his main areas of concern: the inability to connect with people, the morphine dependence, the talking to imaginary friends…and a Steel Mountain employee gets him and we’re starting! Elliot is just so damn awks with people, why is he in there again instead of anyone else? Mr. Robot screams a plausible stream of invective in his earpiece while Elliot stammers about being Sam Sepiol and “you should look me up”. He is nicely dismissed. But! Bill Harper DOES look him up, and thanks to Elliot’s incredibly slow walking speed and the editability of Wikipedia by virtually ANYONE, he gets his tour.

Angela is packing; she’s leaving a crying Ollie and thank Thor for that. She lets him know she uploaded the CD and THAT’S why she was going through his bag! To get his swipe badge so that HE will be blamed for killing AllSafe! Yay Angela! I mean, nooooo, boo Angela for bowing to the bad choice, but still, good for pinning it on ahole there.

Bill Harper is trying, I swear, but poor awkward Elliot is distracted by Mr. Robot shouting “YOU HAVE TO KILL BILL NOW!!” in his ear and now Elliot has to be mean to poor nice Bill. Don’t be mean to Bill, Elliot. Find another way. Nope. I guess the point is that he’s not killing Bill, but I bet this little speech about Bill not having anyone care when he dies will stay with him for a very long time. Mr. Robot practically whacks it in the car listening and I just. Why, Elliot? I may have cried with Bill.

Bill has called the wrong supervisor. Trudy Davis shows up, not Wendy and how could they not prep for more than one person? Anyway Trudy isn’t having it and summarily dismisses Sam Sepiol (is that a question?) while the Dream Team desperately tries to find some online leverage on her. They find nothing but her husband’s cell phone, which they use to spoof his text and vaguebook about illness and being at the hospital. She leaves.

I can see now why blowing up some shite in a really unrealistic fashion would actually be kinder to yerks like me that have all the feels for all these random people they’re messing up in pursuit of their goal.

Elliot has to traverse the hallway and pick a lock to get through to level 2, and hey! There’s Tyrell! Ruh roh

We cut to Shayla, who has started Phase 1 of her new and improved lifeplan; she’s a server at a honky tonk! And nervous AF. When asked why she left her lucrative fancy pharmaceutical sales job, she makes me laugh out loud when she says Obamacare. I’m Canadian, so I don’t know if there’s any validity to that, I just remember “Thanks Obama!”.

Elliot watches a Steel Mountain Commercial while Tyrell wraps things up with some ISIS financiers. I don’t even like typing that because Imma paranoid biatch, but that’s what he says. This just goes to show Elliot and gang that humans as exploits ARE the easiest hacks, but that it goes BOTH ways. Elliot manages to spin some reasonable tale (mostly by grunting while Tyrell talks) and they go for lunch while Elliot tries to hack Tyrell’s arrogance.

Off to the executive lounge underneath level 2! Where Elliot will have no communication with the Dream Team and Tyrell makes fun of the 50s waiter. So much judgement on this show, the writing is all trippy again and the musical scoring should absolutely get some kind of award.

Elliot gets scurred by Security and has to run to puke in the bathroom. Is that withdrawal or nerves? Nobody knows. Handily located in that bathroom is a door to the thermostats, he wires like a moho but doesn’t quite get it done. Tyrell walks in and he knows Elliot framed Terry Colby. He knows about Elliot’s dad. He isn’t turning Elliot in, he’s just gloating that he’s found Elliot’s ordinary, pedestrian and boring weakness and is it okay if I agree with Tyrell on this? Now, granted, I don’t think Elliot is that easily manipulated but I felt…dismayed when Mr. Robot got him with the toxic waste / Terry Colby news.

He finally leaves and Elliot is able to rewire the thermostat. Not having as much luck is Darlene, who is being thoroughly schooled in working with the Dark Army. They’ve taken over her program and banned her and Scarfy is worried. I hope we learn her name soon! The only descriptive phrase I’ve heard about her is Allah Akbar and I just don’t think Imma use that one.

Angela has gone home to Dad, who has just gotten off the phone with Ollie. Dad’s lending her money and giving her an apartment and he looks like an old hippie but is apparently rolling and makes a mean French Toast. I’m wondering if he got a settlement from Evil Corp after his wife’s death.

Tyrell and his wife speak Danish and strategize, seriously, they’re like a young Francis and Claire Underwood, but waaayyy more creepy. They’re discussing the upcoming CTO Scott Knowles and his wife, brainstorming about possible weaknesses. Les Ick.

Darlene is shouting at Cisco in the library, my god this woman is annoying. She wants to know why the Dark Army kicked her out and hasn’t gone ahead with their side of the job. She’s shouting about this in PUBLIC. Cisco tells her the Dark Army had already pulled out before the Dream Team even got to Steel Mountain and she responds maturely and with restraint. Jk, she screams and throws books.

At dinner with the Knowleseses, Joanna gently probes and I TOTALLY get a swingers vibe from the women’s side of the table. On the men’s side…not so much. Scott is suspicious of all of Tyrell’s hard won knowledge but Tyrell plays it as though he is just looking to be Scott’s right hand man. Just like Frank and President Garrett on House of Cards…

The ride back from Steel Mountain should have been all lighthearted and fun but the mood is dour. Elliot gets a phone call from Shayla and I am still wondering about her makeout sesh with Angela in the bar bathroom. Awww Elliot smiles and she smiles and I have just a teensy bit of hope.

Joanna continues her probing for weak spots, now with Scott, while Sharon Knowles and Tyrell ignore each other until he asks her how she doesn’t blow her brains out being married to such a bore. She is properly indignant and excuses herself to avail herself of the lavatory…I call bathroom sex with Tyrell!get in there, freakydeaky!

Joanna takes advantage of a turned back and an otherwise empty room to slug back an entire glass of wine and I’m wondering what it says about my sensibilities that I’m more shocked by that then her giving tacit approval with a nod for her husband to bang Sharon in the bathroom.

Sharon is actually peeing, so mebbe it wasn’t all a line, but wow. I am kind of over watching women pee on TV, y’all. In walks Tyrell and that’s it! He’s all in! He’s either assessed her properly or it’s about to get very call 911 up in here. And he has. She spreads her legs and leans back and he…thanks her for a lovely evening. He has found her weakness. Allow me to chime in for a second: in suburbia, sometimes you can think you would sell your soul, and any future lifetimes, for just a teeny tiny bit of excitement, and my guess is that’s what this is. Sharon is confused.

The Dream Team makes it back to the arcade to find out that they’ve lost China and the Dark Army. No applause, only half done, what to do now? Shayla calls again and Elliot mutes it because he’s not happy now? Darlene wants to launch at half; Mr. Robot tries to talks her down because they need more time, but again Elliot has to step in. That’s why he ignored the call from Shayla; he needed to be able to focus on this particular batch of psycho. And they’re oot. He invites Darlene to crash at his place and man I don’t like this plotline, but I saw it coming for sure.

Elliot ruminates on the Sisyphusian nature of their task while Angela counts bills, Darlene cuddles his shoulder and there’s something hinky about the bills and Angela’s dad. There is also a random cell phone on the floor in Elliot’s apartment and no Shayla; it’s Fernando, calling from jail. I don’t understand. Angela literally pauses at two different roads on her run and I don’t understand that either. Deuces, y’all.