Good morning everyone! Welcome back to Wentworth Correctional, where absolutely everything has changed since the death of Bea’s nemesis. Rolling S3:E3 Knives Out after the break.

We’re in the exercise yard with Franky Doyle (Nicole da Silva) working out and one of her gang spotting her when Cindy Lou (Miles Paras) jumps in. You know, I’m not going to tell Cindy Lou her business because I have no idea how CBlock is being run, but you might want to work on issuing threats yourself. Having Eyeliner translate for you loses something. I don’t know much Mandarin (okay just Mi How Kai Lan), but I’m sure someone could teach me how to throw a c-word that doesn’t moo around. Wait, maybe I’m confused by Eyeliner: perhaps Cindy Lou is Latina and not Asian and in that case, come ON! I can throw some shite in Spanish, get on it, Cindy Lou, it’s way more impressive than this:

One thing that was interesting is that Franky’s picked up that Jodie (Pia Miranda) ratted her out. Bea (Danielle Cormack) is patrolling the yard with Maxine, it’s like being back in high school! Maxine (Socratis Otto) gently suggests that maybe Bea should avail herself of the services of the new counselor. Nah, she’s fine, she just needs to treat some more prisoners like children and clean up this whole drugs mess and she’ll be fine!

Bea even strongarms Miles (Jacqueline Brennan) a little about when Will starts his shift, hmmm, Bea, be careful, lady! Also: what the HELL happened with Harry, who murdered him??

Franky’s found out that Lucy (Sally-Ann Upton) is holding, but she doesn’t want to do the value-added sexual favour required to secure the gear, so she grudgingly agrees to pay triple the price. Lucy is good either way

Bea and Maxine are watching Franky flounder, if Bea doesn’t want Franky dead, she’s going to have to figure out how far she’s taking this Just Say No business.

It’s group therapy time! Jess (Georgia Chara) is wary, she doesn’t like people prying into her stuff (like, her baby stealing stuff? That kind of thing?) but Bridget (Libby Tanner) seems the nice and open type. She’d like to kick things off by talking about that doozy of a riot! Franky bursts in, she needs Boomer (Katrina Milosevic) first, fanks.

Franky needs her money, Booms, where is it? Boomer spent it, she figured Franky owed her one. Franky doesn’t have time for this, where is it?? Up her arrrrsssseeee, which leaves Franky

She searches Boomer’s cell, there it is! Behind a picture of Des (?maybe?) and just in time for Lucy and her gang. They just take the money, though, no gear for Franky and now she’s completely out of time.

Bea comes in as Lucy’s gang is leaving, she offers to help but no dice there, Bea’s the reason Franky’s even in this problem! She runs off to the phones to ask Kim for help and cash.

Will (Robbie Magasiva) finally makes it to work, Bea rushes in to ask about why the police wanted to see him about Harry’s murder. Governor Ferguson (Pamela Rabe) walks in and sends Bea off, I think I’m starting to get the hang of the prison layout! Ferguson advises Will to give Bea a wide berth but he’s just here to do his job, ma’am.

Kim (Ra Chapman) is in to see Franky and woooooo does she look GOOD! I mean, she was always gorgeous, but now she fancy, too! Franky doesn’t care, where’s the money?? Kim can’t be offended (of course she will be) given how frantic Franky sounded on the phone, but all she has is $80. Oh Franky

Hey! Sophie (Edwina Samuels) is visiting Liz again, yay!! Listen to me carefully, Liz: do not f*ck this up. This was Sophie’s idea, though, she’s not taking no for an answer and there are things she wants to know. Oh no, she’s aggressive because she’s been drinking. Is she an alcoholic like her mum? They do say there’s an genetic predisposition. Will calms Liz down and advises her to call Sophie the next day. Liz and I think Will’s a good man.

Franky’s working on a knife lock and watching the door in the kitchen, just a matter of time now. Cindy Lou’s only getting a low dose of methadone so she’s even angrier than usual. The gang comes in and kicks everyone out, Franky doesn’t have enough to satisfy Cindy Lou and they’re going to teach her a lesson.

Vera (Kate Atkinson) comes in at EXACTLY the right moment, Franky gives her just that little bit of extra sass so maybe she can get slotted? And that’s it entirely, she pushes Vera bit more and boom! She’s been charged with verbal abuse of an officer.

Hahahahahaha I love this! FINALLY someone’s noticed that Vera is Ferguson’s mini-me!

Franky’s move gave her just a short-term gain, long term pain. Her parole is in jeopardy now that there’s a charge hanging over her head. This is Franky’s worst.day.ever. Even worse than when she saw her dad and her hands were burnt. It’s not getting any better either, but maybe, just maybe she can get some help. Bridget stops her in the hallway, she’d like to have a session with Franky, she’s up for parole soon, right? Franky doesn’t need counseling, she needs a miracle. Cindy Lou’s gang surrounds them, but Boomer’s close! Boomer won’t help Franky either, she’s going to MEDICAL FOR HER HANDS and that’s it: we’re at Franky’s last stand.

She stomps into the Education Centre and starts trashing the place, she’s already lost parole, she doesn’t have anything to lose! Bridget follows her and tries talking, but Franky’s just waiting to be slotted, what does it take for a girl to get slotted around here?? Come on! Will comes in and drags her off while everyone watches and she mutters “about time!” It’s just a stay of execution, though, we all know how briefly Ferguson believes people should be held where they’re safe.

Bridget’s followed, though, she wants to know where that aggression came from. Ferguson points out the convicted criminal part, she won’t allow Bridget to see her, the counselor isn’t necessary. But the department thinks so, Bridget reminds Ferguson…

Back at H2, the women are having a lovely time talking about Dory (Shareena Clanton)’s wee baby-to-be, (Jess giving all the side-eye) until Boomer ruins is by breaking her biccies and not letting Liz help. Bea’s had enough of the bickering and sentences Liz and Boomer to watch out for each other, starting with Liz showering Boomer. Liz and Boomer agree, but there is no way this Change Up screwball scenario is going to work, they ditch each other immediately.

I love Bea, I truly do, and I find myself impressed every episode with her growth, but she’s got to stop treating these grown women like unruly third graders. It’s like the government telling you what needs to be in your children’s lunch: not going to work.

Boomer can’t even light a smoke, though, and trying to pick it up with her lips off the ground in the yard…Jess is there to help and now my ears are REALLY up with that one. She holds a smoke for Boomer, can she help Boomer get her stash of pruno? Sure, and she used to think Jess was a bit creepy (hahahahahaha), but she’s all right, eh?

I’m wondering if Jess is going to plant that in Liz’s cell. She’s definitely up to something.

Franky’s scratching notes into plexiglass when she hears the Governor opening up doors in the hallways. Hm. What kind of prison is this where people can just wander around willy-nilly in the middle of the night and into cells? Ahhh, the Governor wanted Franky to see Jodie being led away to the basement by Ferguson for a beating.

The next morning, Bridget brings Franky the good news: guess who’s being de-Slotted?? NO, GUESS!!?? Franky heard what happened to Jodie, she’s not going. She manages to flirt with Bridget a little, though, yay! She’s just like a teenager sometimes, yeah?

Boomer’s having a lot of trouble just getting undressed…this scene with her in the shower-room stuck in her shirt and bra everywhere is just everything I love about Boomer. Maxine (who looks gorgeous, she’s practically glowing) used to work with disabled people and she sorts Boomer out. I wanted to gif the whole scene, so I just put it all in. I may have teared up at the end.

Bea’s being brought in by the police to investigate Harry’s murder, there isn’t any more Holt crew so they aren’t buying revenge. What they DO think is that Will murdered Harry (there was that axe-through-Harry’s-van-window incident a little while ago when Will thought Harry ran him off the road) and that she helped him: they’re a team!

Bridget is trying to help Franky, but all Franky needs is drugs. How about how she sees herself leaving jail? Everyone left behind is a smoking pile of ashes and she’s being picked up by a hot girl in a hot car to be driven off into the sunset.

Anger and hope, that’s Franky all over says Bridget and that’s about right.

I’d like to apologize for my remarks last recap about wishing we saw Lucy throw down, she’s thoroughly grossing me out right now. I dig people of all sizes, but she’s a mean and ugly-spirited person.

Cindy Lou and gang attack while Franky’s in the kitchen, to be met by Lucy and her gang of portly muscle. Oh. Wait. Just before going into the kitchen, Franky went for a shower and kept almost throwing up, did she and Lucy…? Her arms looked really sore as well.

Oh. She did. She had to screw Lucy to get help. Oh Franky

Bridget approaches Vera, would she consider dropping the charge against Franky? She wants to give Franky a chance at some self-belief but Vera laughs it off, you know how many people have tried to help Franky? Bridget finds just the right combination of words, though…mentor, rebuilding and pushes Vera to make the decision without running it by the Governor. We’ll see.

Bea stops Franky (best day ever!), she’s cleared Franky’s debt with Cindy Lou and come ON! Franky just did that with her vagina! And possibly other orifices, but let’s not dwell on specifics. Franky mocks Bea for thinking she’s some kind of protector, how’d that work out for her daughter? Her husband? She’s the grim f*cking reaper! Bea slaps her.

Maxine finds Bea crying in her cell, she thought she was stronger than this! She hated Harry, why is she sad?? Maxine tells her it’s because Harry was her last connection to Debbie, and her old life. She’s the strongest woman Maxine knows.

Vera and Bridget are in to see Franky, Vera’s dropping the charge! Yay! She just needs an apology and Bridget needs to see her for regular sessions. Franky gives Vera the most sincere apology ever and we all feel it in our waters. It hangs in the air and then time starts again and Gidget (Franky likes that better than Bridget) is oot.

I like Gidget!

Bea sees Will having his DNA tested by the police, she grabs him while everyone watches. He’s right, they need to cool it if they want everyone to believe they weren’t actually a couple. They’re taking his DNA because he was there the night Harry died and oooh, what? Bea doesn’t know what to think about that and neither do I.

We’re out, you lot, until next time keep your Boomer clean and your biccies unbroken, cheers!