I'm late! I'm late for a very important date with Luci!
Let's get on with the Lucifer S1:E11 St Lucifer recap!
It's the morning after Chloe's very drunken evening and she waking up in an underwear strewn room, surrounded by empty glasses, and a similarly vacant memory. Lucifer is waiting for her to wake, and offers her coffee and hair of the dog, all the while convincing her that they got into some sexy times the night before.
He eventually admits that he turned her down cold, much to Chloe's shock and disbelief. She decides that they can mark it down to a fluke, on both sides. Lucifer is rather proud of himself, and is having a lot of fun with the tables being turned. Chloe gets herself dressed, to a degree, and nopes her way out of there.
At Lux, Maze is still trying to get back into Lucifer's good books, but Lucifer has decided to be mad at her forever. One of the luxuries of being the Devil.
Lucifer meets Chloe later at a crime scene brandishing a pair of undies, that he insists she left behind. The victim has suffered a robbery and a gunshot to the chest, in the foyer of the Dunlear Foundation. A foundation set up to help the poor and homeless, run by the victim himself, Tim Dunlear. A former NBA player, ex drug taker extraordinaire and a reformed playboy.
They speak to the witness who found the body, Emmett Toussant. He was sponsored by Dunlear to come to LA from Haiti. He's a volunteer who had arranged to meet Dunlear, but found him dead. He saw a man outside who did a runner, and thinks he was homeless.
Malcolm has Dan captive and handcuffed to a pole in a dank basement, I'm having flashbacks of Breaking Bad right now. Stay away from the bathtub! Dan tells him that as much as he hates Lucifer, he won't let him kill him. Malcolm insists that HE isn't gonna be the one to kill him, it'll be the jealous ex with his fingerprints all over a gun stolen from police evidence.
Chloe and Lucifer speaks to Dunlear's widow, and his assistant Kyle. They are upset that along with Dunlear's death, the major fundraising gala planned will now have to be cancelled, seeing as the foundation is now an active crime scene. Lucifer generously offers up Lux as a new venue, feeling that Dunlear and he were kindred spirits. Bad boys turned good, and all that.
Lucifer goes to see Linda, and tells her he has come to the realisation that good deeds feel good. Who woulda thunk? It's a rush, a high! Like cocaine and molly mixed with Pop Rocks! She tells him that it's great that he's feeling good, but true goodness needs to come from a place of selflessness and authenticity. Lucifer totally agrees, he authentically wants people to applaud the real him, the Devil gets a terrible rap you know.
Chloe and Lucifer have tracked down Dunlear's stolen items to a pawn shop, where a homeless man has been trying to sell them. He tells them that he was already dead when he got there, and that they had been friends; Dunlear would have given him the shirt off his back. Chloe goes to check out his alibi, and Lucifer is moved by his story of his friendship with Dunlear. He decides he can be benevolent too, and literally gives him the shirt off his back. And his pants.
After a quick wardrobe stop, they head back over to talk to Tim's widow, Vanessa, but are cock-blocked by the Foundation's counsel, Will Fleming. Lucifer tells them that he's just there to talk about the gala, and leaves Chloe to the lawyer. She asks him about his and Vanessa's whereabouts but he tells her that there's someone else she should be speaking to, Emmett.
Emmett and Dunlear had had an argument the night before, it seems that Emmett's scholarship money might not be coming through after all. He agrees to cooperate with the investigation, and starts to spill the beans on the Dunlear's relationship. Tim hadn't spent a night at home in months, and a hotel key card was found in his wallet. So, an angry wife? A mistress? The suspects are increasing by the minute.
Lucifer has agreed to attend a Golden Donors luncheon on Vanessa's behalf, and wastes no time in get friendly with the rich, older ladies. Chloe doesn't have much luck getting any gossip, and suggests that Lucifer do the old look into my eyes trick. Lucifer can do better than that though, and decides to grab a mike and break in to song.
The ladies eat it up, and Chloe spots assistant Kyle, who looks upset, before exploding at Lucifer. He is shocked they can all enjoy themselves when Tim is dead, and tells them they should all be ashamed. Kyle admits that he was in love with Tim, in fact they were having an affair. They never met at a hotel though, it was always at Kyle's apartment, and Vanessa knew all about it. The only thing he can think of that might give them a clue, is a photo Tim sent him for safekeeping. It's a picture of a farm? And a goat?
Malcolm tells Dan about what he experienced when he died, how his two seconds of death felt like years down there. He made a deal to get out, all he has to do is put a bullet in Lucifer. Malcolm may have added the part about Dan taking the fall, just an added bonus you know?
Will Fleming goes to see Chloe and warn her off investigating Vanessa and other member of the Foundation. They're all good people and he has instructed them not to talk to her. She later asks Lucifer to do his mind trick on them, but Luci has turned over a new leaf, and has decided that this evening is all about the children, not some murder investigation! It's for the greater good! Chloe tells him that the old Lucifer would have known that parking his ego would be the greater good, and she misses that guy.
Amenadiel's having a nice meal and a glass of wine, when Maze interrupts, telling him she followed the sweet stench of failure to find him. He tells her that she only looked for him because she's alone and needs someone to talk to. She tells him that he's so boring, and that they have NOTHING in common. But here you are, Maze.
Chloe and Kyle go through Tim's phone records and find that he had recently been in Haiti, secretly. The Foundation was building a school there, and the photo that Tim had sent Kyle was from a couple of days ago. The school should have been almost finished, but it's still farm land? Those monies did not end up where they were meant to go, they went to something else, or someone else.
Chloe is glammed up for the Gala, and drops in to see Will Fleming in his office. She tells him that she knows about his desire to do good and help people, and she's found that he doesn't charge the Foundation for his work. He doesn't want to take anything away from those children, but apparently Vanessa does. She shows him financial records for Tim, but needs him to have a look at Vanessa's. He baulks at violating his clients trust, but she convinces him that the Foundation can still do good, if he'll help.
Dan manages to cut the ties holding him, and busts his way out of the basement. Meanwhile, Lucifer is in his apartment, and turns at the sound of the elevator, expecting Chloe. But it's Malcolm, with a gun, telling him that he's here to murder him.
Lucifer eventually recognises him as Malcolm, and warns him that shooting him is a one way ticket to damnation. But Malcolm tells him of his deal with an Angel, Lucifer's ass for his. Lucifer cracks up laughing, realising that it's Amenadiel who has hired Malcolm to kill him, digging that fact that it really is Opposite Day today. Suddenly serious, he shows Malcolm his true face. Malcolm has seen this all before, and asks if that's all Lucifer has got? He puts the gun to his head, telling Lucifer that he's heard the rumour that he's not immortal anymore. Lucifer asks what he gets in return, and gets the giggles when Malcolm tells him he's gets to live his life and not go to Hell. Lucifer tells him that he's been duped, Angels can't take a mortal's life. And even if he does live a long life, he will eventually die, and still go to Hell.
Lucifer pulls out his Pentecostal coin, that he had planned to use to get back to Hell eventually. But he supposes that you could use it to get out of Hell as well, and perhaps it could be of use to Malcolm. He offers him a deal of his own, his life for the coin. Malcolm snatches that baby up, and books it out of there.
Lucifer is sitting back having a drink, contemplating what just happened when Vanessa arrives to see if he's coming down to the party. He tells her he just needed a pick me up drink, and pours her one too. She tells him that she's headed to Buenos Aires after the party, she has a ranch there and needs some time away to recuperate. Lucifer tells her that he once knew some people who did the same, Nazis. It all starts to click that she was the one who killed Tim, and that no doubt Chloe was working right now to prove it. She pulls her gun, and Lucifer seriously can't believe the night he's having. This time though, there's no hesitation and Vanessa shoots Lucifer three times in the chest.
Dan bursts in to Lux, madly searching for Lucifer, and finds him looking very dead on the floor. Dan thinks he's too late, and just about has a coronary himself when Lucifer takes a breath and sits up. They're both shocked to find him alive, and Dan tells him he knew that Malcolm was going to shoot him and was trying to stop him. Lucifer tells him it wasn't him, that he made Malcolm an offer he couldn't refuse. Dan nearly cries with relief, and Lucifer offers him a drink or two, as he head down in the elevator.
Vanessa is speaking to the Gala, and Lucifer scares the hell out of her when he appears behind her. He takes over the speech, and thinks there is no better way to honour Tim than to reveal his killer. He starts his mind trick to get her confession, but Chloe interrupts telling him there is no need. She and Will have already found the evidence of her embezzlement, and that's probable cause. Lucifer makes her confess anyway, and everyone sees just how evil she really is.
Later, Maze returns to Lux, with some mad bed hair after a romp with Amenadiel. Lucifer has decided that maybe he is speaking to her after all until she tells him that she had sex with his brother. He turns the tables and tells her that Amenadiel has in fact just tried to kill him, but it didn't work, and even when someone else shot him, he didn't even bleed. Maze is confused as to why he is back to being immortal again, and this gives Lucifer an idea. He has a theory he needs to test.
Lucifer goes to see Chloe, and she asks if it's St Lucifer or the Devil who has come to visit. He tells her that he's back to his old self, St Lucifer has retired. She tells him that she's been thinking about their relationship, and that it goes beyond work and sex. That she can let her guard down around him, and she doesn't do that with anyone else. He listens, and uses a knife behind his back to slice his palm. It cuts, and he bleeds. She tells him that he makes her vulnerable, and maybe that's okay.