Hi guys! Welcome back to The Magicians where Quentin is literally carrying someone on his back, Julia don’t curr about anything and Margo is surprisingly trying to stop a war. Rolling S2:E9 Lesser Evils after the break.

Quentin Coldwater (Jason Ralph) wakes up in a box at Brakebills, last we saw him, he was getting knocked the fck out by Kady Orloff-Diaz (Jade Tailor) so Penny Adiyodi (Arjun Gupta) could figure out that Q was harbouring an even more annoying version of Alice Quinn (Olivia Taylor-Dudley) as a Niffin.

Professor Lipson (Keegan Connor Tracy) and Dean Fogg (Rick Worthy) try to convince Quentin to box Alice because he’s dying, but he pooh poohs, we’re all dying, aren’t we? Quentin’s just sped things up considerably by hanging onto an angry Niffin.

Fillory High Queen Margo (Summer Bishil) and High King Eliot (Hale Appleman) are for sure the least trusted rulers ever, but they did last much longer than most of their predecessors. There’s a war at the borders, rolling magical brownouts and an almost dead king, but Margo would like to just deal with one problem at a time, thankyouverymuch.

Abigail the sloth has come up with a solution: if Eliot volunteers to duel with the other ruler, it could be settled without raising an army. Tick Pickwick (Rizwan Manji) warns Eliot: they didn’t mention that before because Eliot will probably totally die but he’d die popular! First ruler to volunteer, he’d be the greatest of all time.

Alice tries to talk Quentin into releasing her, she’s not like those other Niffins! She’s a cuddly Niffin who just wants to practice high-level magic! Quentin doesn’t want to know a world without Alice, but if he doesn’t figure that out soon, he’s going to have to. He’ll be dead within days otherwise.

Speaking of dead soon; Eliot’s gonna fight a duel with iffy magic and zero (literal) swordfighting practice! King Idri (Leonard Roberts) has won every one of his 14 duels and Eliot is starting to see what those statues might cost.

Penny and Kady free Julia Wicker (Stella Maeve) who is in jail for killing talking trees. I’m with her; those trees were total dicks. Penny gets them out of there so they can talk about who they think Reynard the Fox (Sean Astin)’s son is: Senator John Gaines (Christopher Gorham).

They watch one of his speeches; he’s incredibly charismatic and steeped in magic without even knowing it. What will he do when he finds out?

Eliot’s wife Fen (Brittany Curran) has come up with an ace in the hole: a sword and spell written specifically for a king. Everyone only knows the two common spells, but this one will work because it is just for him. It’s all about invoking Ember!

Julia, Kady and Penny burst in on the Senator, he’s scared and they’re right: completely oblivious to the fact that he’s a demigod. Julia goes at him with a straight razor, all they need is his energy! Dead makes even more energy!

Up to that point he’s been scared and confused, but Julia’s plan pushes him over the edge into his destiny.

Then he faints.

Margo has gone to Abigail the sloth for advice about The Wellspring as she’s the only one being honest with them and they can’t risk a magic brownout during the duel. Abigail has one idea, but her page warns Margo not to use it. Abigail has suggested petitioning the fairies to fix The Wellspring, but as her page Rafe (Sergio Osuna) explains: the fairies drive a tough bargain and can be difficult to contact. Margo wants a meeting with the human ambassador, chop chop!

Penny’s brought Senator Gaines back with them to Brakebills, that’s probably not safe…especially with Julia wandering around with her straight razor and metal ball to put his energy in. I just do not believe Julia Wicker is gonna be able to kill a demigod. He’ll defend himself or Reynard will show up to do it for him.

Margo’s got an idea for Eliot! How about he does a musical number as he marches into battle against Loria? There’s a historical precedent and he WAS in Les Miserables! Suddenly we’re in it, SQUEE!! I love musicals!

They do One Day More and then Eliot it off to meet his maker.

I’m sorry, but Eliot looks sexy AF in that last shot, whew!

King Idri is confused. Are they not fighting today? Yeah they are! The battle is joined with Idri getting first blood but Eliot’s deft footwork puts the furry king on the defense. Then he just runs away while Eliot and Margo wonder what the hell is going on. Eliot has to follow; the battle isn’t over until one king is dead. We’re into the woods, Prince Ess (Arlen Escarpeta) is being super duper helpful.

Julia’s come to see Quentin, but it’s Alice that she gets. It seems the reason Alice is being a raging bitch is that she’s lost her shade too and instead of laughing inappropriately like Julia, she’s settled on psychotic harpy. Julia is intrigued by her offer but the effort has been too much for Quentin’s body and he slumps to the ground, bleeding from his nose.

Reynard has indeed come to help his son, he’s communicating from outside the wards at Brakebills which is freaking out the Senator even more than Julia and the gang. He’s brought screaming into the Medical wing where Quentin is stubbornly dying.

Eliot acquits himself well in the woods; just as he’s about to deliver the killing blow there is a brownout and Idri gets away while Margo has to go meet the fairy ambassador.

The brownout is excellent news for Reynard because now the wards are down at Brakebills too.

The fairy ambassador (Samuel Roukin) doesn’t have great news for Margo, but then we expected that. What we maybe didn’t expect was that the fairies want a royal baby.

Eliot and Fen’s baby, to be precise, so Margo’s half-hearted musing about getting knocked up doesn’t mean anything. She swears at the ambassador and that’s it: there is no other deal available and it cannot be amended because she’s offended his Royal Gothliner.

Idri has Eliot treed as Margo makes her plea to Fen; oddly lacking any specifics, just a request to follow whatever instructions Margo gives her. Fen agrees while the Ambassador watches on in appreciation. He digs her skill, but Margo shows a previously unseen sense of self-awareness.

Now fix that wellspring, fairies!

Eliot and Idri bond as the Lorian king chops down Eliot’s tree; aww, they commiserate about ruling over a bunch of ingrates, hey: at least Eliot isn’t gonna get old!

And then the flirting!! Woo hoo! Idri is all the way bisexual and if he didn’t have to kill Eliot, he’d be down for some other swordfighting, ifyouknowwhatImean and Ithinkyoudo.

Kady’s explaining the basis of the Senator’s charmed life to him when Penny runs up looking for Quentin. Julia’s also missing, looks like she’s found another weapon to use against Reynard. God she’s an asshole.

Penny and Quentin are frozen behind the wards when the Senator rounds the corner; Daddy’s home! Reynard and John are together, Penny and Quentin are free and Julia is PISSED. I can’t think her shade is really gone if she’s still clearly emotionally invested in killing Reynard.

Magic’s back! Lookit the fairy hands!

Kady’s got Julia trapped in a Clean Room, no magic possible. Kady’s been making excuses for Julia but she can’t any longer and she can’t allow her to endanger any more lives, so enjoy the room, ahole.

Eliot’s back and alive from the duel, yay! Oh but so is Idri, because there’s this thing nobody brought up (hard look at Fen) wherein Fillorian kings getta have a wife AND a husband, he and Idri are getting married! “One big royal polyamorous family!”

So how did you have The Wellspring fixed anyway, Margo?

Quentin has decided he can’t do this any more; he frees Alice to go do beautiful magic. She looks hella evil when she leaves, so I doubt that’s gonna go exactly as planned. And we’re out!

Margo is displaying more growth than I would have expected from her arc in season one; it’s all very dark, good thing she’s got the chops to pull it off. She could probably get away with 100% less Ice Cube nose-flaring, though, for the record.

Poor Quentin, he barely factored this time around, but we got so much Eliot!! So much!! YAY!!

I’d apologize for all the One Day More gifs but let’s not kid ourselves: I’m not sorry. I LOVE musicals!! Everyone should always be singing and marching in step! Plus it’s perfect for Fen who always acts as though she’s an extra at a RenFaire.

Cheers, until next time!